Trapped!
by For Eden
Summary: For Mamoru, life was fine the way it was. He was happy as bachelor with no commitments. That was until his mom decided that she wanted grandchildren…
1. Chapter 1: To Do List

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Trapped!   
  
by Eternal Angel  
  
anna@wishing-blue.net  
  
http://anna.wishing-blue.net/  
  
Chapter 1: To Do List  
  
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There were various things that Chiba Mamoru had on his to-do list. There were some household things such as "do the laundry", "pay the bills", and "buy some chocolate", and there were other active things such as "go to the social on June 8th", or "buy another green blazer to annoy Motoki". But, even though this to do list were very extensive and detailed with things ranging from all sorts of importance to mind manner reminders, there was one thing that was left out of his list that his parents had circled, highlighted, and wrote in thick permeate marker on their list.   
  
"Marry off Mamoru."   
  
He had of course seen blatant note the other day when he had visited his parents, like he always did each Sunday. The note was obviously meant for him to read as sat in the living room of his parents two-story house, waiting for his mother to finish setting up dinner. He sat on the sofa adjacent to his father's leather couch that his father himself was sitting in, reading the newspaper. He raised his eyebrow at the note that was left out on the coffee table on the "To-Do List" stationary, which his mother had also given him. It was sort of eerie, as if it was beckoning him to do something he didn't really want to do. It wasn't as if he wasn't attractive enough to get the attention of women. But Mamoru also thought that women were nuisances. He also found that they were always wanting this and that, acting all pathetic and pretending to be cute. Other than his mother, he didn't think he truly loved any other women on earth (or ever would). He had already been burned in his high school years. He had fallen for a lovely girl who was his senior. Beautiful green eyes, deep black hair, and a body the male student body lusted after, she was everything a guy of that age wanted. But of course, she, being the attractive fox that she was, played him like a fool.   
  
He didn't bother to trust any other women after that. But then again, none of them ever seemed trustworthy enough for him.  
  
He stared at the note some more, picked it up, and turned the notepad upside down in a satisfying manner. "Note be gone," he thought with an amused expression. His mother soon called him to dinner as she looked down onto the coffee table and frowned.  
  
"You saw it, didn't you?" She asked him, one of her hands went to her hips in a sassy manner. "And what do you have to say about it?"  
  
"Saw what? What's for dinner, Mom?" He asked innocently, as he walked into the kitchen, his father following him from his place from the coach, discarding his newspaper on the coffee table.   
  
"You know Mamoru, you aren't getting any younger!" His mother scolded him, glaring at the back of his head with a scary expression that made chills go down his spine.   
  
"I wouldn't want to get any younger." He responded cleverly, as he held out a chair for his fuming mother to sit in. "Come on, I'm twenty-eight. I've still got many years ahead of me."  
  
She pouted then, looking wistful. "But Mamoru, I want grandchildren."  
  
He sat down noticing that his father had not commented at all. Then again, he was probably wise enough to know that adding his two cents wouldn't be a good idea. Still his father had to try his hardest to sniffle back a laugh as Mamoru responded to her quite innocently.  
  
"So –you thought about adoption already…?" Mamoru asked her, looking sincere. His mother let out a frustrated grumble of nonsensical words, before stabbing the bean sprouts onto a plate, scrapping her semi-fine china into pieces.  
  
Mamoru couldn't help but feel proud.   
  
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His mother stopped calling him for a few days.  
  
He didn't mind though. Heavens, it was a blessing that she stopped pestering him, with her firm yet very frail voice that made him feel bad for not doing what she said. But still, getting married wasn't something that he wanted to do. Heck, he loved being a bachelor; he had lived in his 'bachelor' pad for the past five years and it was still unruffled with any female trinkets such as flowers or doilies, or the toilet seat being down. His neat and spacious flat was chock-full of masculinity from the black and simple interior to the beef that sat in his freezer, waiting for him to make into steak.  
  
Who needed a woman to ruin this great setup that he had?  
  
His mother, who had broke and called him after the fourth day, scolded him and told him, "There are just some things you can't do without a woman."  
  
"Like what?" He asked his mother, as he held the cordless phone in his ear, as he took out the slab of beef to defrost before he fried it up and made it into steak. His mother responded in a simple and perky voice, "Sex."  
  
Mamoru dropped the phone.   
  
The last thing ever that he needed to hear was his mother tell him that he needed a wife so that he could have sex. No wait, it wasn't that, but the last thing Mamoru needed to hear from his mother was that WORD coming out of her mouth. Yes, it was a well-known act that he knew she knew and she knew he knew, but never did they ever jump into the boat as to acknowledge that fact because it was… it was…  
  
He picked up the phone from its place on the kitchen floor, shuddering.  
  
"Mom, I don't really need to hear that from you," he said, in a curt voice, knowing that for some reason he knew that he needed the steak more than ever now. For some reason he knew that some part of his manliness will somehow depart after this conversation with his mother.  
  
He stabbed the meat some more, hoping that the frost would hurry up and disappear.  
  
"Come on, Mamoru, you know you that an active young man like yourself should marry off so that he can produced some offspring before it's too late. You may be young and vibrant now, but sooner or later you're going to turn into a crusty old man and who are you going to get to marry you lest have your children?"  
  
"I heard that some old men impregnate their wives even into their sixties." Mamoru responded, simply.  
  
"Mamoru, recent studies show that lonely, single men die first. Trust me, Mamoru, when I say this, you are not going to make it even close to sixty if you keep the status quo."  
  
He stabbed a fork into the stab of meat, hard, as the juice squirted itself out of it, slowly dripping out. He shuddered, "Thank you Mom, for your assessment of my life line."   
  
He concluded that the steak had defrosted enough.  
  
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His mother had blackmailed him into going to dates with prospective marriage partners the following week. It started after she read a romance novel where the mother of the hero posts up an ad on the newspaper with a very strappingly handsome picture of the hero on it with the words millionaire, desperate, and marriage somewhere in the ad column. Mamoru was, of course, not any that was mentioned. Mamoru was slightly better off than an average salary worker, but way off and away from being a millionaire. Thus, that was the reason why he had agreed to going to these prospective marriage meetings with of course, no intention of getting married. He must admit though, the crop that he had to choose from wasn't really all that great either.   
  
He had met various girls, from quiet shy ones to loud sly ones. Of course they weren't so bad, if you liked fake, desperate, and even lecherous women. But the one that was most frustrating would be Gigi. She wore a pair of dark sunglasses and a scarf as if she was some Hollywood movie star that everyone must marvel at. She must have had some plastic surgery because he could tell that more than one part of her body was fake and he wasn't even going to mention which part. Each conversation he had with these women were always the same too – what you do for a living, what are your interests, and do you like children? After the first couple of times, he decided to be creative, although one of his creative creations caused his date to pour her soup on his head, (but he wasn't going to take too much into what brought that about only that he was from now on to be careful about the topic of anime being art or just a form of random cartoon). Yes sir, he had to be careful about that from now on…  
  
"Gigi said she really liked you and really wishes you accepted the proposal although Himiko has said she never wanted to speak to you or hear your name ever again. Shall I wonder what had happened, Mamoru?" His mother asked, as he sat at the dinner table. He shrugged. "Tell Gigi I have no interest in marrying her, and as for Himiko…She was a very strange girl. Can you pass me the rice?"   
  
His mom handed him the rice with a distant sigh. "Mamoru, you know if you don't find a girl soon I may have to do something drastic." She told him, with a stern look. Mamoru turned to his father. "She isn't going to do her newspaper ad plan, is she? Does she know that libel is illegal?"   
  
But Mamoru could feel something inside of him quaver. He had concluded a long time ago that his mother, when put her mind to something, was a very scary woman. EXTREMELY, ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY frightening beyond anything imaginable. He looked at his father with Bambi eyes, pleading him to save him from this monster…he meant his mother.  
  
His father opened his mouth but was soon interrupted by his mother. "Honey, don't you DARE tell him. You see, I want him to fear for his life."   
  
Mamoru swallowed hard as the rice bowl was passed to him.  
  
"No thanks, I think I lost my appetite."   
  
His mother let out an evil cackle.   
  
For someone who has been telling him over and over again that she was going to die soon, she was having way too much fun with this.   
  
His father looked sympathetically at him.  
  
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He checked the personal ads everyday in the newspaper, because he didn't know what his mother was up to. After a couple of days of not seeing it in the newspapers, he couldn't help but feel uneasy. He especially began to feel uneasy when he noticed how the stand sold more than one newspaper everyday. Additionally, it also sold magazines… Glossy magazines that woman would read from cover to cover…   
  
  
  
"One of everything." Mamoru mumbled to the man who stared at in him surprise.  
  
"One of everything? Even of the Teen Beat?" He asked, looking at Mamoru slightly… Mamoru shifted uncomfortably. Mamoru racked his head for an excuse that he could possibly come up with. And of course he was only able to think up something that was pretty… lame.  
  
"I'm dating a high school student," Mamoru explained. "I stood her up yesterday so I thought I'd buy her stuff that she likes and give it to her, you know, so she'd stop being so mad at me. I know she likes to read a magazine, but I forget which one."   
  
The man seemed to buy that, as he nodded. "Yeah, a high school student. I want me one of those." He told Mamoru, as he put the newspapers and magazines into two paper bags. "Well, I hope you two make up."  
  
Mamoru coughed. "Uhh, thanks."  
  
Mamoru walked away with the two bags with a shudder. 'High school student,' he balked, 'that's more than ten years younger than me and so…'  
  
He shuddered again pondered how his mind capacity couldn't think of anything better than that excuse. But then he remembered, he had a lot of stress because of his mother and therefore was allowed to be as lame as he wanted to be.  
  
That thought, sadly enough, made him feel better as he walked back to his flat, with the bags of newspapers and magazines in his hand. "Now all I got to do is read all of these."  
  
He did too. He looked through the newspapers first before going through the magazines. He found out many things about the government as well as how that movie star that he liked was caught shoplifting at some store and how scientist finally think they found a way to make soda less fattening but the side effects includes sleep loss and the urge to run around in circles. He was halfway through Teen Beat when the doorbell rang. Teen Beat was actually a very interesting magazine, he laughed at the way the magazine assumed guys acted and was even more amused at how they obsessed over clothing. He was halfway through the article about Lizzie McGuire when the doorbell rang.  
  
"I'm coming, I'm coming," he muttered, putting down the magazine, and hoping that it wasn't his mother. He was already up to his neck reading all of these magazines and newspapers and trying to figure out if she put anything in any of these publications about him. He opened the door.  
  
"Yes?" He said, as the girl pushed the doorbell again. She looked at him then, her blue eyes shining, her golden hair cascading, floating around her and her pretty blue dress. She had a huge grin on her mouth and two suitcases plopped down next to her.   
  
He raised his eyebrow.  
  
"Are you Chiba Mamoru?" The girl asked him, as she reached for her pocket to pull out a … picture of him?   
  
"Yes…"  
  
She grinned. "That's GREAT then!"   
  
She then wrapped both arms around his neck, reached up, and kissed him hard. Her body pressed against his own as her lips tasted sweet against him as he stood there, surprised at her action. She soon left his lips, yet still stayed pressed up against him, her face still close to his face.  
  
"Hello, my name is Tsukino Usagi, I'm your mail-order bride."  
  
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I: I have been writing a ton of comedy lately. I wonder why that is – should I worry? Is my sense of humor even funny? *sighs* the contemplating that I have!  
  
II: Thank you to Ekaterinn for editing my story, you rock lovely. Thank you to Stef for also reading my story as I feed it to you. I'm glad you enjoyed.  
  
III: This story is for Kii and Brow, I love you both! 


	2. Chapter 2: Heaven Help Me I Think I Los...

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Trapped!   
  
by Eternal Angel  
  
anna@wishing-blue.net  
  
http://anna.wishing-blue.net/  
  
Chapter 2: Heaven Help Me I Think I Lost My Mind  
  
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Mamoru stood there, frozen in place, as he felt the blood drain away from his face. 'This must be a joke,' he said, as the blonde girl stood pressed up against him with a gleeful expression on her face. Staring at her blankly, Mamoru's overtaxed thought processes soon resumed work, causing him to what any other man would do in such a situation: Mamoru grabbed the light blonde up into the air, placed her down an arm's length away from himself. Then he took one large step backwards, closed the door, and let it screech out a happy "slam!"   
  
He let a frustrated sigh.  
  
This must be some horrible joke that he couldn't help but conclude. His mother was probably at home, knitting some gaudy sweater while giggling on the sofa as she imagined exactly what was going on right now. For someone who has been saying that they won't be alive forever and is getting closer and closer to death, she sure is having a lot of fun.   
  
If only he had known that this was what his mother had planned for him he wouldn't have spent all that time and money on those frilly magazines and newspapers. Instead, he could have used the money for an airplane ticket that would take him away from his mother. Yes, who would have thought that that such a frail elderly woman could be the thorn of his existence upon this planet?  
  
The doorbell rang once again.  
  
"Mamoru?" The sickly sweet voice of that blonde who had… what color eyes again? He forgot, although he did remember she had cherry tasting lips and was actually quite a talented kisser —  
  
'But she was sent by my mom,' he told himself. That thought made his body run cold in fear. Mamoru groaned and contemplated climbing down the fire escape. But for how long could he hide from his mother's evil wrath? She must be an actor though; his mother wouldn't have really signed him up to be married through the mail… or… would… she?  
  
Okay, maybe if he explained to the girl the entire situation. He would tell her that his mom was insane and sometimes unaware of what she does. She would understand and leave him alone, preferably forever. Yes, the girl looked reasonable enough (…what color was her hair again?) and seemed really sweet (at least her lips were…). Yes, she seemed like the type of person that would understand a nicely put 'go away and never come back.' Mamoru swung open the door. "Yes?" He responded as he leaned against the door with a keen and cautious eye on her.   
  
'Blue, her eyes are blue.' He stared into them, beautiful gentle orbs of sparkling mirth and amusement. Her lips were crooked in a devious smile as her hair cascaded down like golden waves. As for her body, with the light pink spaghetti strapped knee length dress that flowed around her, he was able to appreciate her, ehh, body parts. 'She's pretty cute.' And, if it was any other situation except the one that he was in at the moment, he would have truly considered asking her out to a date or something of the sort.  
  
"Aren't you going to invite me in? I did come all this way for you, don't you know?" she asked him, her suitcases in hand. He broke his appreciative gaze of her and then stared blankly. She pouted at him, "Please? Mamoru?"  
  
He debated with his mind, sighed in defeat, and let her in. 'I can't fall into a trap of looks, that's what happened to me before. I have to get her out of here. I can't let my mother win…'   
  
"My mom probably set this up, but I want to tell you that this was not done with my consent and that I don't like these type of jokes. Therefore, I think you should leave soon, I'm really sorry about dragging you all this way, but," Mamoru explained to her. She smiled, put her suitcase next to the leather loveseat, and sat down, leaving plenty of room for him to sit aside of her. He took a seat at the one seater across from her. She stuck her tongue out at him.   
  
"Mamoru," she said, as she regained her composure, her eyes gazing deep into his own. "Don't be so crude. Your mother wouldn't have sent for me if she didn't know that you and I would be perfect for one another." With those words, she leaned forward, propping her elbows on the coffee table, staring at him with big eyes, and having locks of hair tumble about. Her voice became husky, "I know I can please you."  
  
"Ahhh…" He said, a little breathless for a moment, as he took in this girl's sexual allure. She sure was very beautiful. Then again, he had already come to that conclusion. "No, I'm sorry, you have to go." He said, shaking his head as he stood up to make some coffee.   
  
She sighed and brushed her hair back from her face. She rapped her fingertips at the leather armrest in amusement. This man sure was a stubborn one. He was not falling for her advances at all. But, boy, was he handsome, with his deep blue eyes and troubled expression; his was a face worth drooling over. It was almost a shame that she had to add to his perplexity, but she also loved how these events were turning. Signing up for this job had been one of the greatest things she had ever done.  
  
A moment later he brought two cups of coffee to the coffee table, one for himself and another for her. "Here is some coffee for your troubles. I must tell you that I have to send you back to where you came from. You see, I don't want, nor do I need, a wife. All this is my mother's doing, she believes that if I don't marry now that I will never marry thus reducing her chances of having grandchildren."   
  
It was obvious to her that he must have rehearsed that line in the kitchen when he prepared to coffee. She just ignored him, acted as refined as possible as she put sugar cubes into the coffee that he had brought in on a small plate. For a guy that was acting like he was an avowed bachelor, she noted, he sure was very domesticated. "Ahhh, I've heard this already. It was on your profile."   
  
She took a sip of coffee.  
  
"My… profile?" He looked at her, perplexed.   
  
"Of course, your profile. The Aoi Agency does not blindly marry women and men off together, didn't you know? There are applications and a selection process. This is a top of a line Mail-order-bride agency that has a very prestigious reputation of matching up couples together. You are very lucky to have been processed in such a short period of time. Some must wait for years and many are even rejected from the selection process. There has not been one divorce that has ever occurred between a match from the agency." She told him, matter-of-factly.  
  
"But I didn't sign up for this." He was exasperated. "Please understand that I never asked to get married. It's my mother."  
  
"Yes, yours was a strange case. Usually they wouldn't let someone else submit a form for consideration, but you were an exception." She recalled, "I think they felt bad for your mother, I heard that she was a dear woman in the brink of utmost frustration over you."   
  
Mamoru grated his teeth. Darn that scheming woman, always making him seem as if he was the monster here. "I'm sorry, but I must say that the marriage is off (even though I can't say it was ever on), so, after you finish your coffee, I must invite you to leave."  
  
Usagi put down her cup. "Oh? What are you talking about? Marrying me?"  
  
"Didn't you come here to marry me?"  
  
The blond shook her head. "Not at all silly, why would I get married to you when we are already married? See? I have the paperwork to prove it also! I'm what you call nonrefundable or returnable."  
  
He looked ill.  
  
She grinned. "You see Mamoru? You're stuck with me."  
  
Mamoru stood up, walked towards the window, climbed through it and onto the fire escape.  
  
"HEY! What are you doing?" She quickly ran to the window.  
  
Mamoru didn't answer, instead he ran down the flight of stairs like a madman.   
  
Usagi craned her head out of the window, and watched him dash out like a mad man. Usagi sighed, as she returned back the love seat. Her eyes landing onto something laid on the coffee table, blending in with the dark wood. She let out a loud hoot, "I wonder how far he gets before he remembers that he forgot his wallet?"   
  
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Of course it took his car not to start, the payphone to not accept his phone card that he had in his front shirt pocket, and an attempted mugging for Mamoru to realize that he really needed his wallet. Especially since the poor guy that attempted to mug him looked like he really needed the money. 'He too must have been oppressed by his mother when he was young.' He couldn't help but empathize while grudgingly turning back to his flat.  
  
'Maybe she's not there anymore!' He tried to think, hopefully.   
  
Eight ball says, try again.  
  
While marching up those dozens of steps, he ended up lamenting as he got closer and closer to an unknown reality that stayed in his home. Maybe, there was some way he could bribe the woman into leaving him, he brained stormed. Yes, he would be okay with sending her money now and then as long as she left him alone with his life. It wasn't as if he was planning to get married always.   
  
Maybe there was a way that he could convince her to cooperate by staying far away from him. To Mamoru, that sounded like the best damn idea he had ever thought up since the day in fourth grade that he decided to free the penguins from the zoo. He entered the unlocked flat to see the blond completely engrossed in his Teen Beat magazine that he had bought from the newsstand. He let out a sigh. "I'm back."   
  
She looked up from the magazine then, bemused to see her so-called husband. "Did you know the actress that plays Lizzie McGuire is named Hilary Duff? She's coming out with a CD soon."  
  
"Yeah, I read that too. Her video premiere for her song 'So Yesterday' was on the 29th. If you vote now she can be on TRL on MTV." She watched as the dark haired man closed the door behind him, took a seat across from her. She let out a grin. "You're back so soon," she teased, "your escape through the fire exit was a failure then, I take it?"   
  
He let out a nonchalant shrug. "I decided that I should take this situation like a man and come and discuss the occurrence with you face to face."  
  
She put down the magazine and held up his black leather wallet. "You forgot this didn't you? So how many blocks did you have to walk before you realized?"  
  
"Three, but I kept on walking after I remembered it," he said, glaring at her.  
  
"Friend wasn't home when you called?" She asked.  
  
"No, payphone didn't accept my phone card."  
  
"Did you see a hobo and want to give him some money?"  
  
"No, he tried to mug me. He looked like he really needed the cash though."  
  
The stared at one another for a moment.  
  
"Are you going to try and bribe me now?"  
  
"Yes, let me think up of a good starting line first." He had a perplex expression on his face that was heavy in contemplation. She rolled her eyes, "How about, Usagi, the situation that has been forced upon us is an unnatural one…"  
  
"I'm impressed, you're pretty good." He said, as he took the wallet and put it in his pocket and looked at the fire escape again. 'If negotiations fail…'  
  
"I nailed the window shut, so that escape attempt again is going to be a difficult one." She interrupted his thoughts. His eyes then moved onto the blonde figure in surprise. "You nailed it shut? What if there is a fire?"  
  
"We'll die together like how they do in romances," she teased.  
  
"You don't find this situation rather odd at all? Wouldn't you rather find yourself a husband and fall in love with him?" He asked. "I can't provide you with the type of relationship that you're probably looking for."  
  
"I signed up for this, I know what to expect. But Mamoru, you have to realize what marriage means." Usagi told him, moving to the one seat and plopping herself into his lap as she strung her arms around his neck. "You have to look beyond the fact that it was your mother who wanted you to get married and see it is a good thing. When you're married your boss and friends understand your moody behavior and mindless mistakes because you can say your wife did this and that. Half of the housework gets done, shopping is helped, and the little things around the house gets completed."  
  
Mamoru raised his eyebrow, at her. "Go on."  
  
"Plus, your mom will forever leave you alone." She said, bringing her face next to his until he could feel her soft breath tickle the side of his face. "Being married isn't a horrible thing, Mamoru. Not unless you think it's because I wouldn't make a fitting bride…"  
  
Her eyes were low, the strap of her dress was falling off to a side, and her lips were in a round pout. "Am I not good enough?"  
  
He groaned. The girl was beautiful in a very childish yet elegant manner. There was nothing about her that wouldn't please a man. "That's not it… you're perfect."  
  
Taking assessment of what she had said, he couldn't help but agree that maybe she was right, this was the best choice for him right now. It would appease his mother and hopefully make life a little easier for him. "Okay, Usagi, I agree. Let's be married."   
  
She beamed, embracing him in a tight hug, cutting off all circulation or his ability to breathe. Heck, he was even seeing spots now… "GREAT! So when do you want to consummate the marriage now?" Usagi asked, only to find a dark haired man passed out due to lack of oxygen. Her eyes widen in panic as she shook the man. "Mamoru? Mamoru? What's wrong~~~"  
  
Life for Chiba Mamoru was going to be very interesting from now on. Of course, good or bad, it was still undecided…   
  
  
  
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I: I happen to like Hilary Duff's song "So Yesterday". I actually got into her music when I was researching her for this story. Prior to researching, I didn't even know that her name was Hilary Duff. I just called her Lizzie McGuire ^^;;.  
  
II: I would like to thank Stef for encouraging me by letting me force feed this story to her and have laugh at the idiocy that is Mamoru (sorry folks, it's true, he's a dork). I would also like to thank Brow-troll for editing my story, without you… let's not attempt to think how blah this story would look.   
  
III: WAI! I must say that I have been getting the most WONDERFUL reviews off of AI and FFn. Thank you all for reviewing my stories with your wonderful and positive feedback. I am so glad that there are many readers that took their time to read my story and comment on it. *hinthint* I would love some more feedback, if you could.   
  
IV: Sorry for being slow, writing isn't one of those things I can do so fast and well anymore. I'm getting old. Not fun at all… but I will continue on trying! 


	3. Chapter 3: White Lies

Trapped!  
by Eternal Angel  
Chapter 3: White Lies

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She _lied_ to him. Three days into their wedded life and he already noticed that his wife could not cook, clean, or do any household chores without making one of the rooms in his house dirty than it was prior to her entrance. In other words, his wife was useless and she hogged up all the sheets at night. 

Chiba Mamoru was not please, not pleased at all.

"Tsukino..." he spoke up as the two of them ate breakfast together (did he mention the fact that she ate more than he did?). She looked up from her comics page and orange juice with a slight tilt of the head.

"Usagi," she corrected, "is my first name..."

"Usagi... when did you say I was going to start benefiting from this relationship?" Mamoru asked her, perplexed. Already, his business sense was telling him that this was a fiscally bad choice in the road that would not get any better any time soon. Already, he could calculate the losses and see that even if he were to live past his sixties, he'll probably die from a stroke soon after from having to overwork himself in order to feed his overly bubbly wife.

"Your mom stopped calling you didn't she?" He opened his mouth to respond but quickly stop, assessed the statement, and then promptly stood up, plate in his hand.

"Usagi-dearest, would you like me to make you more toast?"

"Sure."

It was then that Motoki came over bearing gifts.

"Helllooooooooo newlyweds," the blond man cried into the house after somehow bypassing the lock that was on the door (how was it that childhood friends discovered methods to get into the house that you didn't even know about?). Grumbling at the toaster, Mamoru decided that he had enough of today and wanted to go back to sleep and restart his day over some other way. Motoki in the morning wasn't something he enjoyed very much. Motoki in the morning always reminded him of overactive squirrels high from radioactive acorns.

"Motoki!" Usagi exclaimed, jumping from her seat before swinging herself into the arms of his best friend who promptly swung her around, nearly hitting over a cup or two...

The bread then jumped back up from the toaster. "You two know each other?"

"Of course we do! We met at the wedding!" Motoki exclaimed with a grin. "You really should have been there you know? It was really nice, they had lots of flowers and the banquet was fabulous. Usagi's best friend is a caterer you know..."

"Don't forget the drinking contest we had. I never knew Rei could drink that much... And then there was Minako's singing. Goodness, I was so glad she could come. Seeing how it was put together so last minute I was afraid that she couldn't fit it in her schedule, her being famous and all." Usagi said with a giggle. "That must have been the happiest day of my life! Everyone I cared for was there... It was a real shame that you couldn't be there Mamoru."

"Who got married then?" Mamoru asked perplexed, "I never remembered receiving an invitation."

"It was our wedding silly, of course you weren't invited."

Unsure how to respond to that, Mamoru stood there for a bit of time opening and closing his mouth as nothing came out. Finally, with a curt nod he bade his wife and best friend a good night and retreated back to bed. He had decided that he wanted to start the day off with a better morning.

* * *

He gritted his teeth as everyone in his company congratulated him on his new lifestyle. His boss gave him a hard smack on the back and grinned while his coworkers fed him cake and showed him photographs of his wedding that they all were so conveniently invited to. Eventually, the party and the chaos stopped and everyone resumed their work. 

Mamoru sulked at his desk.

"Beautiful bride you have," Jadeite told him, rolling his seat next to his friend's desk. "She was very lively and festive. No one played limbo the way she did."

"Oh? You like her? You can have her if you want, I won't mind." Mamoru said while rolling the stress ball he had on his desk.

"Naw, I'm not all up for that infidelity thing. Anyways, I need to ask your wife to introduce me to one of her friends. The one that won the drinking contest. She was really sophisticated. I think she's a politician's daughter... but yeah, it was the best fun I ever had at a wedding! It was a shame that you couldn't make it."

Mamoru kicked his friend's chair violently, rolling it back towards the direction of his desk. The coefficient of kinetic friction busted his plans of having his friend smack back into his desk painfully by not only slowing him down, but by allowing him to gracefully stop right at his desk.

Mamoru glared at the carpet and cursed physics with an angry scowl.

"Now, now, Mamoru, Newton wouldn't like for you to curse at him. He already has all the university students creating voodoo dolls in his likeness. Come on, aren't you an engineer? I thought you'd made friends with physics long ago."

Why was it that the people around him always were able to read him like an open book? He swore he had no real facial expression, but still they knew what he was thinking.

"It's not fair," Mamoru growled. "Newton did all of his greatest work in only three years of his life, without needing to go out too often. He was more obsessed with his hair than anything else. Not only did he get recognized during his lifetime, but damn it, he wasn't forced into a life of marriage at all!"

"See, this sort of attitude is what caused you not be invited to your own wedding." Jadeite told him before dodging a stress ball aimed for his face. "Yup, you would have definitely been the party pooper at that event."

If only glares could kill.

* * *

He was looking forward to going home and locking himself inside his bedroom, away from his wife and everything and anything that revolved around her by reading within the silence of the room. They called it escapism and he decided that he was quite pleased with that term. 

He should have known that ever since his first failed attempt to run away failed, that he had horrible luck when it came to fleeing. Instead of silence, he came home to blaring music, multiple female voices, and a handful of shoes discarded by the front entrance of his house. Definitely, his "fight or flight" survival skills was a wavering tool and he couldn't help but wonder how human evolution skipped him when it graced humanity with that trait.

He was about to turn around and find a nice park bench where he could try to freeze himself at by sleeping there for the next five days when a loud voice yelled out his name. "Mamoru! You're home!" A flash of gold and a swirl of white came at him. He soon found himself lying on the floor with his wife sitting on top of him, grinning.

"Welcome back!" She said with a grin, her loosely tied hair brushing against his face. "You're just in time to meet the girls!"

She stood up then, disengaging herself from him, allowing him to regain the use of his lungs, which she had so greatly sat on top of. Groaning, he pulled himself up from the ground only to land sight of eight curious eyes staring at him, assessing him.

The raven haired girl was the first to break the silence. "I give him a seven. Truthfully, I would have given him a higher score if it wasn't for that awful green blazer he's wearing."

"Disregarding that awful fashion statement, he is still a hottie. I mean, how many people can wear such a monstrosity and still look breathtakingly gorgeous? He's a ten all the way." The blonde said with a wide grin.

"He reminds me of my old boyfriend," the brunette said with a thoughtful look, one of the girls threw a throw pillow at her for that comment. "Ken was a bit better looking though. I think he's a nine and a half."

"An eight." A quiet voice chipped. All eyes switched on her in bewilderment. The blue haired girl became flustered and red. "...I erm, agree about the green blazer."

"Well I think he's an eleven," his wife said, with a grin as she plopped back onto the sofa and waved for him to come sit next to her. He came, dragging his feet slowly across his carpet before sitting down next to his wife. Once he was seated, she introduced each one of her friends to him. He greeted them awkwardly.

"Your mother called today, she wanted to remind us to go to dinner tomorrow."

He let out a line of curses.

Makoto applauded. "Good one, have a special Makoto-baked cookie."

He looked out the outreached tray in front of him before hesitantly grabbing one. Although he didn't like to admit it, he had a horrible sweet tooth and liked to indulge it a lot. After biting into the cookie, he felt that he was in heaven before helping himself to seconds and thirds... The girls found it all amusing and watched him consume cookies for a bit of time.

"Ne, Usagi," Minako said, "have you talked to Kunzite lately? I thought I saw him at the wedding. But even there you were avoiding him."

Usagi let out a sly grin then, her blue eyes twinkling. "I did a good job then. I purposely made sure not to give him my new address or phone number so that he couldn't find me. I'm hoping that he'd forget about my existence for a period of time. I would like to be left in peace for at least part of my life."

"You know that's not how it's going to work. He'll find you, he always does. Remember that time you went out of the country and he followed you? That man won't leave you alone. You should know this by now and accept it. You know that once he finds you, he's going to throw you into a room and lock you up until he gets what he wants." Makoto told her with a stern look.

"Why didn't you just do what he told you to do?"

Mamoru stopped eating the cookies for a moment (although the pile was decreasing at a steady rate) and raised his eyebrow at the conversation that was occurring. What was going on? Who was this Kunzite and why was he stalking his wife? Not that he cared or anything. Of course he didn't care.

"Because he asks for too much!" Usagi said with a whine. Mamoru watched as his wife let out a pout before waving her hands around madly. "That man whips me until I give him what he wants! He barely lets me eat or sleep. Work work work he makes me do. I'm tired of it! He should know that now that I'm married I just don't have much time for this anymore."

"Now Usagi, that's just what you get for being a-"

"Just leave her alone and allow her to enjoy the little time that she has left." Rei said in a cool tone before picking up a deck of cards and a bag of gummy bears. "Now who wants to play poker?"

Excusing himself, Mamoru retreated to his room then, leaving behind the empty plate of cookies before heading to his bedroom where he would lock himself up like his original plan. He was attempting to indulge himself in Stephen Hawking's "A Brief History of Time" when he found himself unable to focus on the book. Instead, his mind reeled back to the conversation that occurred in the living room.

Who was this mysterious Kunzite and what sort of relationship did he have with his wife? Why was his wife's friend so nonchalant about the entire situation even though it appeared that Usagi was in a real tight spot? Why did it sound as though this man had an S&M fetish?

Frowning, he discovered that he couldn't understand it. What exactly was going on with his wife? He knew for the few days he was forced to spend in her company she never mentioned anything about her occupation or her financial standing. Not only that, but he pretty much knew nothing about her (well, he did find out what her favorite food was and her favorite color, but that information wasn't anything crucial). For all he knew she could be an illegal alien that wanted a green card thus throwing herself into a marriage with him. That or she could have some dark shrouded past that she was trying to run away from and was using him to make sure she wouldn't get caught.

He contemplated the mystery that surrounded his wife for the next hour, book lying discarded in his lap and blaring music entering the room through the crack of the door.

* * *

_That took awhile to get out. I apologize for that. I would have gotten this chapter out sooner if it wasn't for the fact that I am one lazy lazy girl. Also, please excuse all my physics insertions into the chapters. I happen to be majoring in the evil field, and thus would like to scare people with random physics facts every moment that I can. Heh. Anyways, thank you to all that waited patiently for this chapter and I hope you enjoy it! Also, special thanks to ChibiAnon for proofreading this chapter for me!_


	4. Chapter 4: When there is smoke

Trapped!  
by Eternal Angel  
Chapter 4: When There is Smoke…

* * *

He wasn't able to sleep well that night. Other than the fact that his new wife enjoyed sleeping in strange odd positions that usually involved him landing on the floor or with a foot pressed against his face, his mind continued to linger on the conversation that his wife had with her friends.

Not that he cared, hell no, he cared naught at all.

He was just, mildly interested, that's all. Potentially, it could be something that could affect him, was what he had reasoned out to. Yes, that was the only reason why he was mildly interested. Because it was highly probable that his wife could be doing some dirty business which would then in turn point to him because he happened to be married to this fiendish woman. Heck, she was probably a con artist! That was it; she was just married to him in order to escape her pursuers for the time being. Once she found out it was safe to come out of hiding, most likely she'd steal most of his belongings and then leave him behind in the dust, like most con artist do. Thus, he'd not only be bewildered but wifeless in the end.

He beamed.

Things were finally looking up for him.

* * *

He didn't wake up until two in the afternoon the next day. It was one of the first times since his "marriage" that he had actually had good sleep. His happiness in convincing himself that she was a con artist that would surely disappear with all his belongings made his mind a bit more at ease and thus allowed him to finally catch up on some much needed sleep.

He woke up to something warm on his lips that tasted faintly like strawberries. His eyes opened to blue eyes staring down at him, blonde hair cascading down. Aware that he was finally awake, his wife decided it was time to change this chaste kiss to one that can put the French to shame.

"Good afternoon Mamoru!" She said after, grinning at the befuddled mess that she had left behind on the bed.

Mamoru stared at her with a blank look.

"It's about time you woke up," she said, "You see, I couldn't really figure out how to work the DVD player. I did contemplate whether or not I should try; however, the last time I attempted it was at Mina's house. That… was a sight. The DVD player sort of started smoking… then there was that fire… and… but yes, I contemplated trying to work your DVD player… but I decided it against it for the sake of your DVD player's lungs and the fact that I nailed shut the fire escape the other day…"

Mamoru then grabbed hold of Usagi's hands, her eyes staring into her deeply. "You made the right choice. For the sake of my beloved electronics life, please do not try to operate them without knowledge or supervision."

"No promises, but I will try."

* * *

She was never punctual. He had noticed that about her the few times she needed to leave the house for an appointment, only to realize that she was late. Therefore, it was quite surprising as well as appalling when she had decided today was the day that she would do something out of her norm. She didn't suggest that they arrive on time for dinner at his parent's house; however, she asked that they arrive early so that she might socialize with his mother.

He once learned awhile back in high school that women socializing with one another was never a great combination. Not when he knew that he was going to be the topic of all the hot gossip that might come out. He had more than one embarrassing moment that he didn't want his mother to be telling anyone; however he knew for a fact that one of those stories happened to be her favorite to tell to anyone who lent her an ear.

And so, this was the reason why he couldn't help but crane his ear as the two Chiba women were in the kitchen, talking and laughing.

Laughing was fine. Excessive laughing was a bit worrisome. Usagi laughing till she coughed and wheezed while his mother chuckled let him know that the third grade trip to the zoo story was finally revealed to his wife.

Mamoru slumped in his chair.

"I tried to talk your mother out of it," his father told him. "But she had her mind set on this… And when she got Aoi Agency's approval… it really took off then. Why else did you think we didn't invite you over for two weeks?"

"Pity?"

"From your mother?"

"Point taken."

* * *

Dinner was quaint. Well, it was for everyone other than Mamoru. To Mamoru it was an agonizing event. Before, he was able to shrug off his mother's comments by either a) ignoring her, b) responding in semi-witty, sometimes even dodgy phrases, or c) stuff his mouth full with food and stare at her helplessly as he pointed to his overfilling mouth, however, he discovered that with two women at the table, he had trouble dodging comments. Still, he had noticed that generally, his mother did pay less attention to him. Which was a good thing…

'I think…' he couldn't help but say, as his wife and mother laughed to themselves after speaking in some weird female jive that he didn't really understand.

He stared at his father for support only to find that his father had abandoned the male population and was actually actively conversing with the other two females at the dinner table. Mamoru stabbed at his potatoes.

"Traitor." He huffed. His father shrugged at him.

"You have to learn how to live in harmony."

Mamoru took another jab at his potatoes.

"It's already dead sweetie; I tested all the pulses of the potatoes before they were cooked. One of them happened to be still alive, but I made sure to stab it a couple of times and it died painfully." Usagi remarked with a smirk.

Mamoru looked up from his potatoes for a moment, his fork still clutched tightly in his hand. He sighed in a defeated manner. "I wish I could die painfully."

"And here I thought you'd prefer dying by poison, silly me. I must remember that for future reference." His wife said with a grin.

"I really do hope you have fun on your trip," Usagi told his parents, as Mamoru stared up from stabbing his potatoes (again) and looked at them in surprise.

"You're going somewhere?"

"Around the world," his father told him. "Italy first."

"Why didn't I hear about this plan?" It wasn't as if he was wounded or anything that he hadn't hear about it, but he was just surprised at the fact that his mother didn't inform him like she did about every little thing that was going on with her life. She had a tendency to call him up randomly and talk about anything that happened to her (like that time she went to the supermarket and ran into the neighbor she really hated).

"It was on my To Do list Mamoru." His mother told him, matter-of-factly.

Mamoru stared at her a sudden realization entering his mind.

"No… don't tell me… you have more than one of those lists?"

He couldn't help but become appalled when she smiled at him.

* * *

"She didn't happen to have anything else about me on her second list did she?" Mamoru asked her nervously, pounding his head against the coffee table with a 'bang'. Usagi watched him from the seat next to him before letting out a sigh.

"Mamoru, darling, you really need to stop pounding your head on the coffee table. You've been doing that for the past twenty minutes and we have decided that no good comes from it." Usagi told him. He sunk into the love seat with a distraught expression.

"I don't want to be in my mother's exploits again." The last time he was the victim of her exploits, he ended up with… Mamoru glared at Usagi.

"What?" Usagi said, sipping her hot cocoa with a horribly large number of tiny marshmallows melting in it.

"I'm just remembering what happened the last time my mother decided to torture me."

Usagi pouted, her beautiful blue eyes watering and her bottom lip quavering. She leaned over to him, "Are you saying… that you… don't like me?"

Mamoru felt uneasy. "Erm… I'm not saying that."

"So… you're saying you like me?" Her blue eyes lit up as she put her arms around him, inching closer to him slowly.

"I…."

'It wouldn't hurt,' he couldn't help but think as her lips came closer to his, the sweet smell of marshmallows teased his scent as her warm breath brushed against his face. He learned forward to kiss her only to have the door slam open (though he could have sworn it was closed and locked).

The two of them jolted apart from one another, staring at the new figure that stood on the door way. There stood a tall man with silver hair tied in a pony tale, a tattoo on his left arm and a cigarette between his lips.

"Who are you?" Mamoru asked the man gruffly, quickly getting to his feet. The other man ignored him as he walked up the sofa, putting out his cigarette butt in Usagi's hot chocolate. Usagi attempted to hide behind Mamoru, only to fail.

"You thought I wouldn't find you?" He said, completely ignoring Mamoru's existence as he stared directly at the blonde with a hard glare.

Usagi groaned.

"I really wish I hadn't nailed shut the fire escape…"

* * *

Thanks to Chibi for proofreading for me... Ahh, the plot thickens and my wonderful Kunzite makes the scene. I hope you guys enjoy this chapter and thanks so much for the feedback! I appreciate it a lot! 


	5. Chapter 5: Lost and Found

**Trapped! **  
by Eternal Angel

_Chapter 5_

"Mamoru, save me." Usagi said to him, her grip as tight as death around his waist. Mamoru contemplated telling her that suffocating his internal organs really wasn't much benefit for the aid she wanted to get from him, but realized that she'd only grip harder (he had come to a realization sometime shortly after their sudden marriage that his wife's logic rarely had any sense to it at all).

"I wouldn't," the man responded in a flat tone, "try and help her. She's really done it this time. Trust me; there is no benefit in aiding the likes of her. I mean, she's a manipulative witch. Didn't she manage to get married with you without your knowledge?"

Finally! He couldn't help but think. There was someone that was riding the same frequency as him! Lately, he was wondering if the entire world was going to hell by the way they had accepted his marriage as if it was a natural occurrence that happened to any old Joe. However, here was a man that empathized with his situation and saw it as a manipulative plot of his wife (and his mother whose sole existence is to make his life as inhabitable as possible).

"You're not going to do like… anything horrible to her, are you?" He asked, as he untangled his wife's arms from his body (though it was like trying to un-stick superglue). The man shrugged, pulling out another cigarette from his pocket.

"It's not horrible."

"Yes it is!" Usagi shot back, jabbing Mamoru at the stomach and glaring at him. "I can't believe you're conspiring with him! I'm your wife damn it, you're to side with me!"

Mamoru rubbed the side of his stomach. He wondered if he could file for divorce in terms of abuse.

Usagi let out a yelp as strong arms grabbed hold of her and slung her across his shoulders. "Why you! Kunzite! Let me go! Let. Me. Go!"

The man saluted Mamoru. "You'll see her in a week or two."

* * *

He started to worry (only slightly) after the third day of his wife disappearance. The first two days was a well deserved blessing that he was convinced that the Big One upstairs thought he had well deserved. He forget what silenced sounded like and exactly the perks of living alone as a bachelors. However, he started to wonder on that third day if he shouldn't have been as easy going to letting that man steal his wife away (not that he cared about her, not really… he just didn't want to be blamed for her turning up dead or anything of that sort).

His worries didn't last long. The brunette from Usagi's party earlier on had ended up stopping by that night to bring some pastries she had made for the two of them. He invited her for some tea and the two sat there facing one another, silently.

Makoto peered into the kitchen as Mamoru served her tea, taking notice at how orderly and neat it was. The sink wasn't overflowing with used dishes and silverware and there were no signs of disaster attempts in cooking. Other than a cup and a plate that sat on the counter, the kitchen was spotless. "Usagi isn't home?"

"Some weird guy with tattoos and a pony tail came and took her," Mamoru said in a 'I don't really care too much, you were the one that bright it up so if you want to talk about it I guess I'll just have to listen to you' voice.

"Hmmmm…" Makoto said, smelling the tea slightly before taking a sip of it. "This is really good tea. Very aromatic and not so bitter. You really need to tell me where you got it."

Mamoru blinked, a bit surprised that Makoto wasn't at all worried about his wife at all. They were friends, weren't they?

"My mother gave it to me." Mamoru answered her question, getting his thoughts back. He wasn't much of a tea drinker so he couldn't tell if it was really different from others. He was a coffee person, with sugar cubes and a bit of cream. A bit of silence hung between of them as Makoto put down her tea cup.

"Kunzite was the one that dragged her out. Minako has a soft spot for him, so she must have told him the location of where Usagi is. So, how did Kunzite drag her out?" Makoto asked curiously. He felt a bit more eased now that she had answered his question about Usagi… then again, it wasn't as though he cared anyways – she was the bane of his existence.

"Kunzite swung her across the shoulder and held down her feet. She was thrashing and pounding at his back and cursing the both of us at the same time. It was rather funny watching his wife get dragged out in such an unsightly and undignified manner. It wasn't as though Usagi was serene; it was just amusing to watch. He also didn't know that his wife had such an extensive vocabulary either. Some of the insults she had called him required him to look up the following night because he had never heard of them before.

It did feel rather good to see her dragged out of the house. After that horrible dinner at his mother's house that involved Usagi tag teaming with his mother and making his life horrible, he must say that watching her glare at him with all the spite and malicious made him feel a bit better. Maybe she'll even divorce him when she gets back. He's tried everything else, nothing seems to be budging her in her decision to stay and play house with him.

"That's happened more than once. I've seen her get dragged out kicking and screaming before as well. But yeah, it's cause of the _business_ she's in… Ami warned her about what she was going to get into, but Usagi didn't listen to her. So now Kunzite is always after her blood and she keeps on playing this cat and mouse game with him. Pisses him off royally. One would think she would just do what he asks her to do instead of putting up such a fight. She has obligations to him, you know."

"Ah," Mamoru's voice feigning lack of interest.

Makoto looked at her watch. "I should be going now, it was nice talking to you again Mamoru. Thank you for the tea as well."

* * *

Ten days after Mamoru's meeting with Makoto (each day filled with blessed silence and renewal of his old days a bachelor – oh how much he missed those days), he returned home from work to see his wife and Kunzite talking heatedly in the living room.

Usagi was scowling at Kunzite, lips tilted in a frown. "Damnit, why can't you just leave me alone? You worked me to the bone for the thirteen days you kidnapped me. You gave me little food and water and wouldn't stop hovering over me. I already did your bidding, salve driver; now leave me alone in peace."

The last bit of her sentence came out as a whine. Kunzite rolled his eyes at the female in front of him, already tired of listening to the sound of her voice complaining and ranting to him as she did each time she was with him. "Yes, of course. I find it absolutely grievous that I forced you to abide by the responsibilities you had agree to when you signed the contract with us."

"I didn't know what I was getting into!" Usagi exclaimed, sinking into her seat with a pout. While sinking into the plush sofas that swallowed her with ease, she noticed the figure that stood near the door, a bit surprised at the strange conversation they were having but damn wasn't going to ask about it. Usagi waved at him to sit next to her. Hesitantly, Mamoru came up and sat next to Usagi, the white haired man looking at the new figure curiously as he sunk in next to his wife. Moments after sitting next to the blonde, Mamoru felt a sharp pain at the back of his head after Usagi smacked him hard. It was then accompanied by a hug.

"I've missed you! But I really do not approve at all with your unwillingness to help me that day! I cannot believe you just let that bastard take me just like that!" Her voice was upset and annoyed as she recalled his stand back role when Kunzite stormed into the apartment. She punched him on the arm again for good measure. Mamoru rubbed his bruises and wondered who taught her to hit because it hurt a lot.

"My parents were happily married before they had me." Kunzite said, correcting Usagi.

"And that's why they're divorced now?" Usagi shot back. Mamoru winced his wife's scathing comment full aware about how sore such a topic could be for the other man. However, instead of being upset or angry at her comment, Kunzite was unfazed at the rude comment. Actually, he looked unbothered by it at all and didn't comment on it either. "Well, not everyone is destined for a happy ending."

It was Usagi's turn to deliver another surprising reaction. That comment had somehow hit a nerve with the usually bouncing blonde. She whimpered and let out a sob. She buried her head in Mamoru's shirt, crying rivers and getting it damp quickly. Confused, Mamoru awkwardly patted his wife on the head as she cried.

It took her a moment to stop her sobs. However, she was still hiccupping and sniffling when she responded to Kunzite. "But I liked Jadeite! He had so much going for him…"

"He had it coming for him; you and I both know that. So please, don't act surprised." Kunzite said in a cold tone. Usagi looked as though she was able to start her to sob hysterically again. "Usagi, you need to start accepting things as they are. You're the one that agreed to get into this business… You should know that sacrifices are needed to make things profitable."

"Anyways, no one can live forever. He was going to die sooner or later anyways."

Usagi shot him a dirty look. "But he was a great guy besides being a drug runner!"

Kunzite raised his eyebrow.

"He was having a change of heart!"

"Not plausible."

"He could have been," she insisted.

With a look that said 'I know better than you', Kunzite disagreed with her. "No, he could not. He was scum and will always be scum."

"Could!"

"Not."

Usagi bit her bottom lip. "I do not like you at all."

"Love, you haven't liked me for a long time. I can assure you that as much as it wounds me to know that, I'll live." With those words, he got up from his seat then, putting out the cigarette in an ashtray that now appeared to belong on his coffee table.

"I'm going to be going now. Usagi, don't you dare try and disappear on me again. My information network is far more advance than you think it is, so I _will_ find you. Let me just tell you that the next time you decide to do such a ploy against me, I refuse to be as nice to you with your punishment as I was this time around. As for Jadeite's death, deal with it."

"Oh yeah," Kunzite said, his eyes changing focus to Mamoru who was sitting there, befuddled at the strange conversation that was going about him. "Thanks for letting me kidnap her the other day. Also, I wish you the best of luck in putting up with the witch with your marriage. Heaven help me, if I were you, I would have bolted out of that fire escape and made it as far as I could with whatever money I had in my wallet and started a new life."

Mamoru winced at that comment, knowing full well that he had attempted that and failed – if only he didn't forget his wallet… Though now that the man had mentioned it, Mamoru couldn't help but wonder why he didn't remove the nails that bolted shut the fire escape that Usagi had managed to hammer in when he was failing in his attempts of escaping.

"Get out Kunzite!" Usagi said, throwing some of the sofa's pillows at the retreating form. He rolled his eyes when three of them completely missed him and one of them managed to hit the back of his leg.

"Please Usagi, learn how to aim."

"Out out out!" Usagi said standing. She had one last pillow in her hand to which she threw with all her might. The pillow hit the door that Kunzite shut behind him with a "floosh" and Usagi could hear the other man's laughter from the other side of the door.

"Urgh, how he frustrates me!" Usagi sunk into the sofa, steaming. After a moment of sulking, Usagi then turned to him, the awkward observer who had no clue as to what was going on, and did something that confused him even more.

She beamed.

"So, Mamoru, what's for dinner?"

Talk about mood swings.

* * *

_Sorry for taking so long to write it, mostly that was me being lazy. laughs I'm always lazy. But yes, thank you to everyone who reviewed and commented on this fic! I'm so glad people are enjoying it! Hopefully I'll get the next chapter out sooner then I got this chapter! _


	6. Chapter 6: Think Bonnie & Clyde

-----------------------------------------------

Trapped!  
by For Eden

Chapter 6: Think Bonnie & Clyde

-----------------------------------------------

"So," Mamoru rolled his chair over so he was now seated next to Jadeite. His co-worker and sometimes bane of Mamoru's existence was currently playing Spider Solitaire on his work computer on expert. Though Mamoru did think that the current move that Jadeite was doing was probably not the best move because of another card that Jadeite probably didn't see, Mamoru thought it was best to continue on with what he was originally going to say. "You're not dead."

The blond did not even look away from the flat screen monitor after his comment. He instead opted to grunt out a response that seem to mean 'isn't that a bit obvious bozo?'.

After the strange encounter with Kunzite again (Mamoru couldn't help but wonder if the appearance of Kunzite in the future will always result in strange encounters) and dealing with his wife's mood swings, Mamoru had finally realized the gravity of the conversation that the two were having several hours later… especially since they were talking about someone that shared the same name as his co-worker.

Not knowing exactly what job Kunzite actually does (or most important Usagi), he couldn't discredit the things that he heard. Thus, when he had entered the office and saw that Jadeite was alive and being his lazy ass like always, Mamoru was a tiny bit relieved that his wife was not a psychopath (thought it might explain some things…).

Though there was an extra part to the conversation that Mamoru could not help but wonder if…

"Jadeite, do you sell drugs?"

His words had caused Jadeite to freeze up. Jadeite then spun his chair around so he was now eye to eye with the dark haired man. Staring at his co-worker in the eye, he couldn't help but notice how stern Jadeite's expression was. Mamoru could not help but feel a bit of a chill run down his spine before Jadeite finally managed to break the silence.

"It depends, what do you want?"

This development had shocked Mamoru. He could not help but feel like a fish pulled out of the water and left at the side of the road. Cautiously looking around the room for any wandering eyes, Jadeite opened up the second drawer of his desk.

"I have Ibuprofen, Tylenol, Advil, Excedrin, some Chinese Herbs and other drugs. What is it that you want?"

Mamoru stared in awe at the stash of drugs (all legal and over the counter). It was like the answer to every prayer someone ever sent up when ill and at work. The feelings of awe and wonderment soon fizzled out and the feeling of outrage replaced it.

"How come you didn't tell me this last week when I was working on the Kino project? I had such a migraine and I would have _killed_ for some extra strength Excedrin and no one had some!" It was now Mamoru's turn to glare at his friend. However, Mamoru's power of intimidation never was able to do much other than get him some pity points now and then.

Jadeite shrugged. "You never asked me."

"I hate you."

"It sounds like you might benefit from some Midol right now…."

* * *

Though the revelation of a nearby drug stop for ailments of the every day worker was golden, Mamoru could not help but wonder if this was what his wife and Kunzite were speaking of the other day. Jadeite did sell drugs (100 legal) and could be considered at scum often enough (it's hard not to think that someone who lazes around and plays spider solitaire rather than working on the Hamilton project is not), Mamoru couldn't help but wonder why they would want to kill him. 

It had then hit him that it was possible that they were talking about a different Jadeite in general. Sure, the name wasn't as common as Bob or Mike, but the probability of two people having the same name was plausible.

Now Mamoru needed to make sure that his wife was not actually a psychopath or murderer (it didn't seem like she was a cold blooded murderer by the way she was wailing to Kunzite), though if it was fact he would have a pretty darn good reason to get a divorce. However, Mamoru could not help but feel a bit of impending doom fall upon him. He was going to need to do a repeat performance of the first chapter and start buying out newspaper stands to read obituaries. He couldn't help but groan about this – the man who ran the newspaper stand was always asking about his high school girlfriend and whether or not she wore a uniform. Mamoru did not want to know why the man wanted all these little details about his non-existent girlfriend.

After speaking some short words with the pedophilia approving vendor, Mamoru had gotten back to his apartment and spread out the different obituary pages on the coffee table. While reading the third newspaper (and concluding that some people just had funny names), he had not heard his wife enter the house nor the act of her peeking at his reading from behind.

"I must say that is morbid."

Mamoru jumped out of his seat from the sound of his voice.

"So why is it that you are reading the obituaries Mamoru?" Usagi asked curiously, leaning over to read one of the names that caused a bit of a giggle. Mamoru did not want Usagi to know that he was checking to see if she had actually killed a person by the name of Jadeite or not (just in case he was wrong, hate hated being wrong). Thus, he blurted out something random instead.

"I'm errr, checking to make sure that no one I know has died."

"That is… sweet of you." Usagi moved onto the loveseat next to him then, picking up the stray arts section he had thrown haphazardly on the side after it fell out of the city newspaper. Usagi flipped through it idly. "Shall I be expecting to see you do this every day now?"

Mamoru really did not want to talk to that stupid newspaper vendor again. The man was definitely frustrated and living his sexual fantasy through his customers.

"I think I will stick to calling them on the telephone."

* * *

Seeing how the police did not come to arrest his wife and bring him downtown for some questioning (he even practiced a bit of a 'my mom chose her' speech in his head), Mamoru could only assume two things. The first was that his wife was a master assassin that covered her tracks and the disappearance of a citizen of planet earth with much ease and skill. The second would be the fact that his wife was not a murderer at all. Seeing how his wife could barely do any chores or walk without the force of gravity getting in her way, it was safe to assume that the latter was the appropriate answer. 

This, however, did not solve the mystery. He still did not know what his wife did for a living. He must admit that the entire assassin thing was a bit outlandish and he wasn't even sure why he even tried to verify it by purchasing seven different newspapers and looking for blood stains on her clothing (he did think he was getting somewhere with it when he saw the blot of ketchup on her chemise).

Not knowing where to go, he did what any other guy would do. He consulted his childhood friend and best buddy over a car racing game on his Xbox 360.

"So," Mamoru said as he barely dodged ramming into the center divide. "How do you find something about a person?"

Tires screeched and Motoki cursed when his SUV went up in flames.

"Have you tried asking them?"

"…"

"…"

"That's the stupidest thing I ever heard."

"There is always snooping around."

"Hmmm… _shit._ Motoki, I'm on the same team as you, you're not suppose to ram me into oncoming traffic."

"Team play is overrated."

* * *

_Oh dear, it's been years. I haven't written Sailor Moon for such a long time! And this fic, my writing style doesn't even match anymore. I re-read the story and decided to try writing another chapter only to realize that shit, I messed up on the name in chapter 5. Thus, I just decided that I would just try and write it in instead._

_Mamoru is just weird. He never likes to do the easy thing to get what he wants, always goes by it the long way. But at least through his strange investigation we come to realize that Usagi is not an assassin. Heh, I'm sure you guys all thought it too... _

_Thanks to everyone that reviewed. I will try my hardest to motivate myself to write. But please note that these college years have been filled with much pain and suffering. Not to mention I am a bit ADD between my Harry Potter fics and my anime fics. _

Snape + Lily 3 


	7. Chapter 7: Not quite 007

Trapped  
by For Eden  
Chapter 7: Not quite 007

Mamoru's snooping of his wife's belongings lead him to realize that his wife might actually be a scholar, despite her blonde hair and chaotic behavior. Other than the suitcase that she had brought with her on the first day that was filled with enough clothes to usurp seventy percent of his closet space, she brought with her a MacBook and an ever growing collection of books.

He didn't notice the fact that the population of books in his house had been increasing until he had tripped over a stack of ancient literature books (a few tragic Greek plays, Tales of Genji, and the Iliad). When he began to explore the other titles that manifested in his apartment, he noticed that there were non-fiction books and fiction books alike. He was pretty mystified when he saw her copy of Thomas Kuhn's _The Structure of Scientific Revolution_. He had meant to read that book but… his wife had beaten him to it.

He couldn't help but feel like a kicked puppy. His wife, who he didn't even know read things other than Cosmo or Elle, had read Thomas Kuhn before he did.

"It's a really good book," his wife saw him fingering the black cover. "You should retire Hawkings for a bit and give it a shot. It's a bit funny how the man was so insistent that his theory could not be used for the social sciences even though he was inspired by the social science when creating his theory."

"After reading that book, every paper I wrote in college related back to _Structures_. The book was definitely my paradigm shift." She giggled than, obviously making a joke about the book that he did not particular get since he did not read it.

It was strange not being the nerdy one for once.

Mamoru wasn't sure if he liked it.

* * *

Usagi's MacBook was password protected.

Though password protecting your laptop was not a strange thing to do, for a person who was known to possibly blow up electronics by touching it, his wife password protected her laptop. And, from what he couldn't help but overhear in a conversation between Kunzite and Usagi, she changed her password every months for security.

That was even more than the computer at work made him do and he was the one working for a defense company. The only thing Mamoru ever saw Usagi do on her laptop was shop online and occasionally post on blogs and forums.

There was definitely something fishy about it.

"My wife password protects her laptop." Mamoru had rolled is chair up to Jadeite's desk during work. He had purchased some ibuprofen from his drug dealer for the splitting headache he received from working on the Kino project and contemplating the possibilities that was his wife.

"That's a good habit." Jadeite moved five cards over to another column in Spider Solitaire.

"That's wrong with it?" Motoki questioned after hearing Mamoru's dejected sigh. The sigh was enough to make Jadeite curious, but definitely not enough to get his attention away from the computer screen in the middle of his game.

"What's so important on a laptop that it needs to be protected anyways?"

"Porn." Jadeite's response was immediate and quick. He had an "isn't that so obvious" tone to his voice.

"Some people are very protective of their porn. One of my old drinking buddies told me that he use to hide his porn in a folder where in this folder, there were six folders labeled 1-6, and in each one of those folders, there were another 1-6, and in those folders, there were 1-6, such that in the end, to get to the porn, you had to be able guess 4-3-5-5-1-2."

"That's obsessive." Mamoru contemplating his porn folder. Like most guys, he just tried to hide his porn in a folder with boring stuff in it, labeling the folder something also reasonably boring.

"Oh yeah. Poor guy, I didn't have the heart to tell him that's so easy to break. You just have to run a search for large video files. They pop up pretty fast that way. Especially when you already know what folder it should be in. If everything else is empty, it's pretty damn fast to search for it."

"So you're telling me my wife password protected her laptop to hide her porn?"

"Naw. You asked me what's so important on computers and I just told you the answer." Jadeite frowned when he found out there were no more matches left and he had run out of cards to distribute. "Though whether or not your wife has porn on her computer may or may not be true. It's like the anomaly of Schrödinger's cat or how in Causal Set Theory they are testing whether or not the speed of lightis constant. It's all up in space."

"Your jokes are even worst than my wife's."

Jadeite shrugged and started a new game.

* * *

In the end, Mamoru was left with the impression that he would make a cruddy spy if he ever decided to go 007. It was a bit tragic to him, because what guy would not want to be like James Bond with all the girls and the all so high tech and nifty gadgets. He had spent many days morning the lost dream.

After coming to terms of his lack of ability to become a spy, he finally relented to his curiosity and asked his wife what her occupation was. Well, he asked after finding Usagi and Kunzite wrestling on the floor. Though it did look more like Usagi wrestling and Kunzite looking rather bored, even after being put in a headlock by the petite girl.

Rather than looking embarrassed at the situation, Usagi easily untangled herself and launched herself onto Mamoru. She had the gull to turn embarrassed after he asked the question. As if it completely slipped out of her mind to tell him what she did as a profession. It was kind of like the way his mother forgot to tell him about his wedding.

"I'm a writer."

"You're a writer?" Mamoru said in disbelief. After the few months that he had gotten to know his wife, pegging her as a writer was an unbelievable thing. She tripped up on speech nearly as much as she tripped up on air. It was utterly strange to learn that his wife actually…

"You actually get paid to write for a living?"

"What's wrong with that?"

"It's just that…" he looked at her in her cute white strappy dress and silver stilettos kicked off the side, most likely lost during her shuffle with Kunzite. Her blonde hair was like waves with a bit of frizz to it. "You just don't look the type."

"If it makes you feel better, her editor doesn't think she can write either. She gets revised papers back bleeding in red."

"I'm a bit weak on grammar, sure." Usagi ignored Kunzite's jab at her. Instead, she grabbed Mamoru to sit down with her on the love seat, snuggling up against him.

Mamoru was not sure how much of her profession explained the strangeness that was his wife. As a person who majored in Engineering, he had only heard jokes about humanities majors and only knew that great thing about taking G.E. classes in the arts would be the number of females there. There were only five girls in his department, two of them happily married with children (or soon to have children) and the other three weren't really that fun to look at.

A puff of smoke floated in the air. Regaining his wits, he looked at Kunzite who made himself quite comfortable on the sofa across from them. Mamoru had gotten him an ash tray after Kunzite repeatedly used cups as his own personal ash tray – even if you were currently drinking from it. The man was in a comfortable reclining position, his leather shoes stacked up on top of the coffee table.

"Are you her editor?"

"Hell no, she's horrible at grammar." Usagi stuck her tongue out at the man. "I own the company."

Mamoru raised his eyebrow at his comment. He didn't understand why a person who owned the company would go out of his way to make sure his wife made her deadlines. Didn't they have other people for such a task?

"We grew up next door. Even were roommates when we went to uni together. I started up my company with her work. She's the best selling writer there… but she's a complete flake. I even tried hiring people to make sure she met her deadlines." Usagi tried to look as if she did not know what he was talking about but Kunzite just snorted.

"Don't even pretend you're innocent. You caused three of those people to break down. After that I realized that I just had to lock you up in a room if I wanted you to get things done."

"Hmph, business majors always act like they can do anything…"

"Shut up or the next time I kidnap you, I'll make sure none of Makoto's desserts make it to you during the days of hold up."

The two of them spent a few minutes bantering back and forth. His wife and her "boss" were like abusive siblings. They would glare at each other, bicker, than result to physical violence where their punches and slaps got harder and harder until one of them screamed out for mom. It was quite different from the usual television version of a brother-sister relationship – however, the relationship was still there.

'I'm glad I'm the only child…' he couldn't help but conclude. He watched Usagi throw things at Kunzite only to have the man pick her up and hang her upside down.

"ARGH! Let me down! I'm wearing a dress! STOP IT STOP IT!" Usagi was flailing around in his grip, his arms holding onto her tight.

He gave Mamoru a cruel smile before throwing Usagi back onto the sofa where she landed partly on her husband. Mamoru wheezed a bit, getting a bit of wind knocked out of him.

"I'll come back on Tuesday. Get your installment done or else we're doing it the hard way."

For some reason, Mamoru just knew that Usagi was going to be doing it the hard way for the rest of her life.

* * *

Notes on this chapter:

I. Thomas Kuhn is a theorist who talked about the structure of how scientific theories are adopted and become actual laws of science.  
II. The porn conversation is actually something my old co-worker told me on how he hid his porn – it was a rather random conversation that I have no idea why he shared those details.  
III. Causal Set Theory is the subject of my semester long research project that is giving me hell.  
IV. Kunzite and Usagi act like me and my brother. I have a very strange relationship with him.

It's so unedited. Please ignore horrible writing. I wrote this chapter a lot faster than the previous chapter, though still taking my sweet time. Ideally, one day I'll finish this fic.

Thanks to everyone who left a review before! I appreciate.


	8. Chapter 8: Research is thy name

**Trapped!**  
by For Eden  
Chapter 8: Research is thy name

This "asking" business Motoki suggested had some merit to Mamoru's utmost surprise. Of course asking Usagi did involved the swallowing of one's pride (though Mamoru did admit that the blow of it was a lot less painful then when he realized that he was not cut out for becoming Britain's next suave and intelligent secret agent slash overall ladies' man) and admitting that he was indeed curious about his wife.

Naturally, Mamoru had lots of justifications for why he was so curious. He had to admit that after being married to Usagi for several months, Mamoru was starting to like the petite blonde. Usagi was lively, interesting, and was unlike the stuff engineers he worked with every day (save for Jadeite who managed to surprise him every day with his drug dealings and project completion while playing Spider Solitaire for what seemed like every second of the day).

Since their marriage, there was rarely a boring moment in Mamoru's life (headaches, however, were a common occurrence). His mother, to Mamoru's absolute dismay, had done a great job with picking out a girl for him. Tsukino (now Chiba) Usagi made more money than the senior engineer did, was undeniably attractive and cute, had a warm, loving personality (save the time she spent with Kunzite), and was a rather easy going, mild manner girl. In short, Usagi was an enormous catch.

This realization (yes, it did take him more than six months of cohabitation with the bubbly girl for him to conclude this) befuddled Mamoru. Being such an ideal candidate for love, marriage, and forever-more, Usagi should not have lacked suitors. Rather, Mamoru could imagine the number of men that waited for to glance over in their direction so that they could swoop down and sweep her off her feet.

However, rather than going after one of the men who must have relentlessly pursued her, Usagi signed herself to a blind marriage matching service and followed through with marrying a stranger who _did not even know about it_. Aoi's marriage matching service was one that he could only imagine that desperate men, women and annoying mothers enrolled in.

What gives?

Why in earth did she marry him then? It was a question that puzzled him so much that he broke and asked her about it when she somehow managed to climb into his lap, MacBook in front of her (online shopping, once again – usurping more space from his closet one click at a time).

Usagi did not bother to sneak a look at him when she answered. Her brows were furrowed together in deep concentration in trying to solve the problem of whether she wanted this cute strappy dress in whisper violet or berry pop.

"Mmmm, I did it for research."

"Aoi Agency commissioned a promotional article about their service and process. I normally would say no to write promotional pieces, however the owner of Aoi Agency happens to be my cousin. There was no way I could tell him no. I decided to make the most of it and try and dabble a bit in writing an investigational piece – I never did one before. I was not dating anyone at the time and your mother nearly had a nervous breakdown when she came to the agency bawling about you when I was looking at candidates. You are quite the difficult son, I heard."

Mamoru balked at the blonde who decided to go with berry pop for her new dress.

"You got married to a stranger to write an article?"

"Mostly," Usagi confirmed her purchase before putting the notebook on the coffee table.

"I also figured this would be a good opportunity to gather some material to develop a plot bunny I had in my head but never quite wrote. I did not expect you to be such a great material though. You like the best thing that has happened to me!"

She threw her arms around him, cuddling up close around him. He ignored the way she smelt like cream and lilacs and instead processed the information she had just released to him.

"You're… writing about _me_?"

"No silly," she shot him a smile that made his heart freeze for a moment. "You're an engineer – there is not a lot of material you bring to the floor. Though you are a bit quirky, buying out newsstands to make sure your friends don't turn in it. However, all you ever do is mope around the house, play video games, and clean up after me."

"Then what is it that you write about?"

"The things you don't do and the people I've met through you. Your mother is wonderful, she's been a great inspiration for this minor character I have in my series. Then there's your coworker Jadeite, who was sort of the highlight of my story until Kunzite made me cut him out, damn him. Jadeite is a hoot; we go bowling every Thursday and even get drinks after with a few friends. Then there is that sweet and funny Persian man two doors down. He's like a grandfather I wish I had …"

Apparently he wasn't good enough to be 007 _and_ he wasn't as interesting as the cranky 73 years old down the hall that would scare off children who tried to Trick-or-Treat at his door on Halloween with a beat up wooden cane.

"I'm just kidding, I write about you all the time." She said it in a tone of voice that didn't even try to be convincing.

Mamoru sulked, "You're just saying that to make me feel better."

It was the pat on the head she gave him that affirmed it.

*

Mamoru spent a lot of time living with Usagi and seeing her in various stages of dress and undress, witnessing her range of behaviors move from elegant to bratty (the latter being the byproduct of being in the presence of an annoying, silver haired man), and learning whatever he could about her without trying to appear overtly curious (he failed), Mamoru came to realized that Usagi casted a spell on him with everything that she was. It was a spell that had him doing all the housework, letting his apartment get invaded by four beautiful girls and one irate male, and letting his bachelor pad turn into a girly library with flowers, coasters and trinkets …

He was completely bewitched.

Mamoru felt a shudder go down his spine as the witch wrapped her arms around him, cherry lips touching his to give it a butterfly kiss.

"Is this love?" His voice was raspy, breathless from his hunger from her. She gave him a stunning smile at his words, her eyes misty and her expression was so serene … he kissed her deeply before guiding her into bed. They fell together, trapped in one another's embrace.

"It's more than that."

He didn't think any more on it. Instead, he let his arms slide across her body, enjoying the way the rough fibers of cotton were replaced by the silky texture of bare skin.

*

After months of freedom from his mother (god bless secondary to do list that involve leaving the country for long periods of time and not being able to harass your only son with selfish demands!), his parents came back and were now reinstating weekly dinners.

The feeling of doom didn't weight upon his shoulder as it used to as he let Usagi joyfully chatter and skip up the stairs to the house. She stopped before ringing the doorbell to turn around and smile brilliantly at her. His heart flopped and he let his right hand grab onto hers, melding her smooth hand with his larger, rougher ones.

As usual, it was his mother that opened the door.

"Mamoru! Usagi!" His mother joyfully greeted them, giving them a bear hug before ushering them both in. Soon after Mamoru found himself abandoned by his wife in the family room while she headed off the kitchen to "help" his mother with the food (Usagi helping in the kitchen had always lead to a mini-disaster). Mamoru sat at the love seat while his father lounged in his chair, eyes glued at the local sports channel.

Mamoru watched half-interested before his eyes caught on the object of his worst nightmares. His mother's to do list. It was strategically placed in the center of the table where not even a remote or drink cup sat on. Mamoru grabbed the list off the table and scanned it.

On the top of the list, was the words "Marry off Mamoru" that had been highlighted, circled, and written in permanent marker. From what he also noticed was that it had been crossed off since the last time he saw the list. Underneath that task was a new addition to the list. It was one word, also written in permanent market, though not highlighted or circled … yet.

"Grandchildren."

Taking out a pen from his right pocket, Mamoru crossed it off the list with two straight lines. His father sent his son a sympathetic look.

"I don't think she can interfere with this one son…"

Mamoru shook his head, a smug look on his face. "No, I'm just crossing off what I already accomplished."

*

**The End**

*

Notes for this chapter:

I. Mamoru is such a weird boy. The fault lies at his homeroom's teacher for encouraging him to become an engineer.

II. This was never meant to be a romance story. That is why the entire "in love" part was so short.

III. I spent a lot of time trying to think up more to this story. However, when I was writing a family dinner scene, the ending came to mind and I realized that it was time to say goodbye…

After many years, Trapped! is now complete. I started writing Trapped! when my interest in Sailor Moon was beginning to fade. Many years later, the last chapter of the story has been written and my interest in the fandom has been rekindled. I'm a bit sad though that the fandom and the remnant of the fandom is no longer how it once was. However, I have found some great fics that I enjoy reading and will try and will myself to write more Sailor Moon fics in a more timely fashion.

Thank you to everyone who has reviewed this fic. I feel overjoyed every time I receive a new review in my inbox. I hope you enjoyed my story.


End file.
